MadLib Weekly Top Three #6

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madlibsBy Kelly Laycock

Only one more chance to submit a silly puzzle for the Monday MadLibs contest! The grand prize draw will be on December 21for the $50 Chapters gift certificate! Thanks to everyone who sent us a submission this week. We continue to see new participants from the legal community, and we appreciate your participation. I’ve compiled the submissions and sent them to our Library staff to choose the ones that put the biggest smiles on our faces. Here are our picks in reverse order…

’Twas the Night Before Christmas

Third Place goes to:

’Twas the night before Ukrainian Xmas, when all through the borscht
Not a creature was running, not even a mouse.
The boxer shorts were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that Vladimir Putin soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their rocking chairs,
While visions of sugar-plums slept in their heads.
And mamma in her toque, and I in my scarf,
Had just settled our ears for a long winter’s nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a honk!
I ran from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I slid like a flash,
Tore open the kobasa and threw up the trumpet.

When, what to my huge eyes should appear,
But a miniature four-wheel-drive tractor, and eight tiny penguins.
With a little fast driver, so alert and intoxicated,
I knew in a moment it must be Vladimir Putin.

 

The runner up is:

’Twas the night before National Love Your Lawyer Day, when all through the podium
Not a creature was submitting, not even a mouse.
The gowns were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that The Right Honourable Madam Chief Justice McLachlin soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their desks,
While visions of sugar-plums articled in their heads.
And mamma in her wig, and I in my tabs,
Had just settled our eyebrows for a long winter’s nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a shazam!
I filed from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I drafted like a flash,
Tore open the brief and threw up the argument.

When, what to my learned eyes should appear,
But a miniature fax, and eight tiny moose.
With a little renowned driver, so esteemed and tenacious,
I knew in a moment it must be The Right Honourable Madam Chief Justice McLachlin.

 

And voted Number 1 by our Library Staff:

’Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the nunnery
Not a creature was farting, not even a mouse.
The habits were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that the Pope soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their pews,
While visions of sugar-plums twisted in their heads.
And mamma in her negligee, and I in my sock garters,
Had just settled our buttocks for a long winter’s nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a phllllbttt!
I threw from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I nattered like a flash,
Tore open the reprobate and threw up the statute.

When, what to my emotional eyes should appear,
But a miniature time machine, and eight tiny meerkats.
With a little happy driver, so frisky and loving,
I knew in a moment it must be the Pope.

 

The authors of each of these masterpieces will be entered into our draw on December 21, 2015. Everyone is welcome to play again next week, the final week of Monday MadLibs. Keep the silliness coming!

 

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