MadLib Weekly Top Three #2

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madlibsBy Kelly Laycock

We had lots of great responses to this silly game we’re playing, and more people participated this week! Thanks to everyone who sent us a submission. We’re glad to help liven up your week a little bit! As with last week, I compiled the submissions and sent them to our Library staff to judge (anonymously, of course…no favouritism allowed here!). It was almost a consensus. In reverse order…

Courtroom Etiquette

Third Place goes to:

  • The majority of trials and other circuses are open to the public.
  • Baggy pants must be taken off while in the courtroom.
  • Ensure PowerPoint is turned off when you go into a courtroom. Accredited bearded ladies of the media who use their PowerPoint or other devices for flipping must display their passports and are reminded that such use must not be disruptive to any courtroom or office.
  • Swinging and cartwheeling is not allowed in a courtroom.
  • Large bags and elephants must be left outside the courtroom.
  • Clowns must stay quiet and not disturb the court.
  • Tumbling or tiptoeing in the courtroom while court is in session is allowed, but must be done quietly.
  • Be thundering to the judge, court staff, lawyers and witnesses.
  • A trapeze artist will announce the opening (and closing) of court, asking everyone to train while the ring master enters (and later exits) the courtroom. Stay training until the ring master is seated, or until he has left the courtroom.

The runner up is:

  • The majority of trials and other picnics in the park are open to the public.
  • Stilettos must be taken off while in the courtroom.
  • Ensure typewriters are turned off when you go into a courtroom. Accredited tricycles of the media who use their typewriters or other devices for text messaging must display their dog tags and are reminded that such use must not be disruptive to any courtroom or office.
  • Lunging and slipping is not allowed in a courtroom.
  • Large bags and razor wire must be left outside the courtroom.
  • Librarians must stay quiet and not disturb the court.
  • Escaping or drowning in the courtroom while court is in session is allowed, but must be done quietly.
  • Be pretty to the judge, court staff, lawyers and witnesses.
  • Macho Man Randy Savage will announce the opening (and closing) of court, asking everyone to kiss while Justin Trudeau enters (and later exits) the courtroom. Stay kissing until Justin Trudeau is seated, or until he has left the courtroom.

And voted Number 1 by our Library Staff:

  • The majority of trials and other Karaoke parties are open to the public.
  • Pants must be taken off while in the courtroom.
  • Ensure microphones are turned off when you go into a courtroom. Accredited feather boas of the media who use their microphones or other devices for boogie-ing must display their Costco card and are reminded that such use must not be disruptive to any courtroom or office.
  • Prancing and strutting is not allowed in a courtroom.
  • Large bags and dance floors must be left outside the courtroom.
  • The cast of Glee must stay quiet and not disturb the court.
  • Shimmying or frolicking in the courtroom while court is in session is allowed, but must be done quietly.
  • Be screeching to the judge, court staff, lawyers and witnesses.
  • John Travolta will announce the opening (and closing) of court, asking everyone to sway while Olivia Newton-John enters (and later exits) the courtroom. Stay swaying until Olivia Newton-John is seated, or until she has left the courtroom.

The authors of each of these masterpieces will be entered into our draw on December 21, 2015, for a $50 gift certificate from Chapters. Everyone is welcome to play again next week. Keep the silliness coming!

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